A Step In The Right Direction
by ForeverMarchingOn
Summary: When you realise the feelings of hate you have towards Rachel are not actually hate but in fact love... what do you do? Especially when you're Santana Lopez, bad bitch of lima heights. Eventual Pezberry romance, rated M for future.
1. Chapter 1

She looked so radiant as she sang, stood in front of us all as we sat and watched her belt out her soul in the small choir room. Rachel Berry's rendition of 'Don't rain on my parade' was just perfect. She was destined for Broadway, anyone with an ounce of sense could see that.. Rachel Berry... I could just see that name up in lights, her picture in all the papers. I could help but fight the small smile tugging at my lips at the thought of seeing Rachel succeed and reach her dreams of becoming a Broadway star.. My attention was slowly caught by that giant oaf sat beside me, he had this giant grin plastered across his giant head. I slowly shook my head, thinking to myself. 'Ugh, Finnoncence, what does Berry see in you?' I grumble to myself, a small crease forming across my brow as I feel a slight pang of jealousy at the fact that Rachel chose to be with Finn.. Wait, what? I shouldn't be jealous.. Why am I even thinking about this? This is Rachel Berry for gods sake.. She annoys me to heavens with her incessant taking. One day she should just shut those lips of hers and let someone else speak.. Those lips.. Those red, plump inviting lips.. Wait no..what am I thinking? I need to get out of here.

/ After snapping free from her thoughts Santana jumped to her feet, grabbing her bag from beside her chair and briskly left the choir room, ignoring the sudden protests from the rest of her Glee members and Mr Schue. With a smirk plastered on her lips, she threw one look over her shoulder as she left them room before regretting it immediately, seeing the fallen expression on the girl stood in the center of the choir room made her feel guilty.. She'd never felt guilty for hurting someone before but as she left the room all she could think about was how she'd been so rude to just walk out whilst Rachel was mid song like that, but she needed to clear her head, she shouldn't be feeling soft towards Berry. She annoyed her to death! Didn't she..?

It wasn't until Santana felt the tap on her shoulder as she reached her locker that she realised she'd been followed. Quickly shaking her head to shake her thoughts she abruptly turned around to be greeted by Rachel berry. "What?" she spat at her, almost making Rachel flinch. "It was rude of you to just leave like that" Rachel began "I was mid song. I know you dislike me Santana, but do you have to be so rude? I thought I'd come after you and give you a chance to apologize. Also, Mr Schue wants to see you. He told me to come and tell you that you need to see him after school. I don't know what he wants but obviously it's about you just walking out mid class" "Berry, shut up. Is it so hard to just tell me your message without boring me to death?" Santana quickly pressed her finger to Rachel's lips to prevent the next obvious outburst that would occur. "I get it, Mr Schue wants to see me and you're pissed that I got bored for your singing" She quickly turned and left before Rachel could say anything else.

The rest of the day was a monotonous blur of class after class. Santana didn't see or hear from Rachel again, mainly because the one class they shared (Chemistry) she decided to ditch and hang out on the bleachers. Once the bell rang to signal the end of school, Santana rolled her eyes as she made her way to Mr Schue's office. There was no cheer practice today; she wanted to just go home and chill in the summer heat. Once she reached his office he beckoned her in, not raising his head from the papers on his desk to look at her. "Take a seat Santana." Santana quickly did as he said, wanting to get this meeting over and done with as quick as possible. "So why am I here, Mr Schue? I guess its about walking out of glee club?" She rolled her eyes just before Mr Schue finally looked up at her, the crease in his brow signaling the annoyance he was feeling. "Santana, walking out of Glee club when one of its members is singing is just disrespectful." Santana was just about to cut in until Mr Schue ignored her and continued. "In fact, your attitude in general is disrespectful. You say hurtful things to the rest of your glee members, you often walk out when you're 'bored' and most of the time you're just plain rude. This is why I have decided that until you can fix this attitude, you're no longer welcome in Glee club. We're supposed to be a family, not bullies." Santana just sat there; for once in her life she was lost for words... Had she really just been kicked out of glee club? She blinked rapidly to hold back the tears that threatened to spill, the feelings coursing through her hurt.. Yeah she was a bitch, but Glee club was the only thing she loved about this school.. Channeling all her emotions into anger, Santana quickly stood. "You're seriously kicking me out? Well, screw you Mr Schue, I hate the glee club anyway!" Ignoring the look of hurt on his face at her words she stormed from his office, the corridors were mostly deserted; the rush of people leaving school had already gone home. Santana walked in a daze to her car, the only thought running through her head the whole drive home 'no more glee...'. Her parents weren't home when she arrived back, they never were. So like usual she went straight to her room and it wasn't until she shut her bedroom door behind her that she recognized the feelings inside her.. Hurt, regret.. Hatred.. And that's when she finally began to cry. "What have I done?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, im so so sorry for taking so long to update. I could give you a thousand and one excuses but basically I just couldnt find the right words to write. . Im not too happy with this chapter, and im too scared to go back and edit as I know i'll just end up deleting a ton of it. But, please, forgive me for taking so long to update okay? I already have the next chapter already written up so hopefully i'll have it up in the next few days. Please review and tell me what you think? Oh, and thank you to everyone who is following this story and who has favourited it. You guys are amazing! :D**

**P.s, this chapter continues on from right from when the first chapter ended. **

**Enjoy! **

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Santana's parents were always working; they were both doctors and were out for the night on the graveyard shift at the hospital. In fact, it seemed to Santana that they were /always/ out working. This left Santana to her own devices, she was surprised at how cut up she was at being kicked out from glee club and instead of following her daily routine after school of finishing her homework before cooking dinner she just went straight to bed. Santana slipped out of her cheerios uniform and into a pair of sweats with an old baggy tee. She glanced at her reflection in the mirror, furrowing her brow as she noticed her puffy eyes from crying before crawling into bed, hugging her arms around her pillow as she hid away for the night underneath her duvet. Glee club was the only part of her day that she truly loved; she couldn't believe she'd really been kicked out.

The rest of the week passed in much of a monotonous blur for Santana, she avoided all contact with members of the glee club, she didn't want any of them confronting her, rubbing in the fact that she'd been kicked out from the one thing she truly loved at this school. The week consisted of classes, ditching classes and cheer practice. The rest of the student body must have sensed her anger and disappointment towards her situation as no one bothered her; when she'd walk down the corridors they would all cower away in fear of being slushied or physically pushed aside. Heh, it's plain to see that with or without glee club she was still HBIC.

It wasn't until last period Friday that she realised it was the end of the week. Puck text her to remind her that he was throwing his party tonight but she didn't need to reply, Puck knew she wasn't one to ever miss one of his parties.

Later that night Santana found herself sat on the couch in Pucks living room, a beer in hand as she watched people grinding together on the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the room. It wasn't until Puck handed her a fresh beer, taking her empty bottle from her that she noticed he had sat down beside her. "What you just sitting around for, Lopez?" Santana flashed him a small smile before taking a sip of her new beer. "I'm not really feeling it tonight" She was always honest with Puck, he was one of her best friends.. They had a weird relationship but it worked for them. "So, Glee sucks without you.." Puck chanced a glance toward Santana, furrowing her brow as she scowled at the mention of the club. "I don't need that stupid club! I'm glad I'm no longer a part of it" Santanas voice wavered slightly, she wasn't so much trying to convince puck that she no longer needed glee but more trying to convince herself. Puck just nodded, placing his hand softly on her knee and giving it a slight squeeze in understanding. They both knew that it was a lie, Santana loved Glee, she missed it. Santana moved to rest her head against Pucks shoulder, leaning into him as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they both sat silently together. Santanas gaze was following Brittany around the room as she tried to dance with Artie. A slight crease forming on her brow as she watched them together, Brittany looked so happy with him. It wasn't that she didn't want her happy, or that she was jealous of her being with Artie, it was the fact that she wanted to be that happy with someone too. Before Santana had a chance to dwell too long she felt Puck slip his hand in hers and pull her up to dance, he obviously noticed that she was getting lost in her thoughts and decided she needed a distraction. A genuine smile graced her lips as she willingly began to dance with him, she even surprised herself when for the first time in at least a week she laughed, shaking her head as Puck decided to cheer her up by showing off his dance moves which he had named the 'mating dance'.

Every once in a while when Puck would get distracted to talk to some jock or get them both new drinks, Santana would look towards the far corner of the makeshift dance floor where the Glee kids were sat together, she couldn't help the slight pangs of jealousy she felt when watching them. As much as Santana hated to admit it, she kinda sorta, maybe actually enjoyed hanging out with those guys, and now she couldn't even do that. It would look weird if she hung out with them all outside of glee club when she wasn't even in the club anymore. It would be total social suicide, and she wasn't about to get herself added to the slushy list. Around her 6 or 7thbeer, Santana caught Rachel looking at her, she looked as though she felt nothing but pity for Sanatana. After flashing Berry her trademark scowl, she finished her last beer and left the party, ignoring Pucks protests as he remained on the dancefloor. She couldn't help but stumble into a few guys as she made her way out the house, the alcohol was definitely taking its toll.

Santana couldn't help the anger consuming her as she stumbled along after leaving the party. Santana fucking Lopez didn't need the pitying looks of Manhands. She didn't need glee. She didn't need anyone! Glancing down at her hand she noticed she was still holding her last can of beer, with a small chorus of curses escaping her lips she tossed the can onto a nearby lawn. She slowly made her way up the path to her house, easing her house key from her bra, she crouched slightly as she tried multiple times to get the key to fit into the door. "Fuck!" She slurred, tossing the key away from her as her frustration took over. "Fucking thing wont go in." Santana slid down the door to the floor and sat on the front step, in her drunken state she decided to sit out and wait for her parents to arrive home to let her indoors. Usually in a time like this she would stay the night at Brittany's but that was obviously a no-no now. "Stupid Wheels keeping Brit away from me" she mumbled to herself.

The sound of footsteps heading towards her shook her free of her thoughts, quickly lifting her head to look up at the new arrival, she almost spat out her words once realising who it was.

" The fuck are you doing at my house, manhands?"

"I think it is I who should be asking you that, Santana. You're sat on my front door step."


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys, here's the latest update. Im not too pleased with here but I thought I'd give it to you anyway. Im going away soon so wont be able to update for a couple of weeks or so. Hopefully i'll be able to give you all a new update before I leave though. Please review and tell me what you think. I love hearing from you all. :D **

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Santana couldn't believe that she'd walked to Berry's house. Of all the places she could go, why did she end up here? Of course, deep down she knew the answer, but she wasn't ready to admit it to herself just yet. Slowly shaking herself free from her thoughts she climbed to her feet, trying not to stumble as she looked Rachel square in the face, her brow creasing slightly.

"Oh right… I thought I was home. No wonder my key didn't fit" She quickly moved to pass Rachel on the front path, deciding she should get away from here as soon as possible, not really caring at the fact that she couldn't even go home now after throwing her key when it wouldn't fit in the door.

She bowed her head and carefully began to walk, trying not to let on how drunk she actually was. It wasn't until she felt a small hand touch her arm that she realised Rachel had followed her. "Why don't you come inside? I know we're not friends but its late, and I'd hate for you to walk home alone. Especially in your current state…" She could hear how nervous Rachel was, it sent short pangs of guilt through Santana, knowing that it was the way that she had treated her in the past that made Rachel this nervous around her. Without saying a word she nodded and let Rachel lead her inside her house, the small smile forming on Rachel's lips indicating her relief at not having her head bitten off with some insult.

For once, Rachel was also quiet as she led her unexpected guest inside, it was clear to her that Santana was drunk and she was sincere in her worry about Santana walking home alone during the night. Rachel led her to the living room before gesturing her to sit. "I'll get you some water" was all she said before disappearing off to the kitchen. Whilst she was alone, Santana glanced around the living room. It was simple, exactly how you'd expect a living room to be. Her gaze focused on pictures of Rachel as child that were hanging on the wall, she couldn't help the admiring smile that graced her lips as she looked at them all.

"That was taken after my first dance recital" Upon hearing Rachel's voice, Santana jumped slightly, not having heard her re-enter the room. She just gave a small nod as Rachel handed her a glass of ice-cold water, which she began to sip gratefully as she let herself sit comfortably on the couch. Rachel watched Santana for what felt like hours. "What?!" Santana snapped, hurt flashing across Rachel's features for just a moment before she composed herself again. Santana tone softened slightly as she felt herself sober up a little, the water obviously helping to dilute the beer in her system. "Sorry.. I just don't take well to people staring at me, Berry." Rachel nodded; she seemed to be debating with herself about what to say without making Santana snap again. "Out with it, Berry." "I was just wondering what made you end up at my house. I'm not exactly someone you like, that is evident, so I was wondering why you are here. Not that, I mean.. Not that I don't want you here! It's a quite pleasant surprise actually." Rachel flushed as she rambled her words, Santana couldn't help but find it adorable. She didn't really know what to say. Why had she ended up at Rachel's house? Why didn't she just walk straight to the empty house that awaited her? "I just didn't want to go home is all. Parents are working; everyone else was at the party still so I ended up here. Pathetic I know." Obviously she was more drunk than she realised, she didn't mean to just jump straight into to talking to Berry. "I was still at the party too though, Santana.."

When she turned her head to look at the small girl beside her, Santana could see the nervous look in Rachel's gaze, she didn't want the Latina to snap at her. "Oh right.. yeah, so you were.. I dunno why I ended up here." Santana stuttered, just as Rachel was about to jump in Santana continued. "My parents aren't ever home and I guess I just didn't want to go home to that big empty house. Britts house is off limits now she's with Wheels. I wasn't really in the mood to wait for Tubbers to return home from the party and shoot me down, we're not exactly friends anymore as you know. There was no where else to go, so I was just walking and I ended up here." Rachel seemed torn between which question to ask first, you could see her expression change over and over as she fought with herself about what to say before she finally settled. "Where're your parents?" Santana rolled her eyes; of course she'd ask that. "They're at work, they're /always/ at work." She scowled. All Rachel did was nod, rolling her lower lip between her teeth; deciding she wasn't going to press the subject of her parents just yet. "But I don't get it, why did you come here? I understand you didn't felt there was nowhere else you could go but why would you come here? You hate me, that became clear with how you decide to… interact with me at school"

There was an awkward moment of silence; Rachel tucked her legs under herself, placing her hands together on her knees as she avoided looking anywhere but at the Latina. Santana could feel her eyes sting with tears wanting to spill; Rachel thought she hated her when in fact she couldn't be further from the truth.

"I don't hate you, okay? I don't hate you..." She sighed softly, resting her head on the back of the couch as she let her eyes close, resting them as she slowly became lost in her thoughts. She didn't know why she'd opened up to Rachel; all she could do was blame the alcohol from the party. She felt Rachel's hand reach across the couch and gently squeeze her own. "Do you want to stay the night?" Rachel's smile was nervous as asked the question, it was evident she wanted to talk more, ask more questions but for once in her life Rachel seemed to know to stay quiet and seemed semi-satisfied just knowing that she wasn't hated by the dark haired girl sitting beside her. Santana was more than thankful that she hadn't asked more questions, she was sure that she would have told Rachel how she felt about her if the conversation had lasted any longer. Damn alcohol making her an honest wreck when she was drunk! All she could do was give a small nod as Rachel grabbed two spare blankets from behind the couch, handing one to the cheerleader sat beside her.

Each of the girls moved to their respective end of the couch and curled up, draping the blankets over themselves, each of them too tired to move upstairs to the bedroom which would have obviously been more comfortable. Santana whispered an almost silent "Goodnight, Rachel". Rachel couldn't help the lazy smile plastered on her lips at hearing the girl use her actual name. "Good night, Santana". Both girls quickly let themselves surrender into sleep, it had been a long night for Santana and Rachel just wasn't used to staying awake this late.

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A small crease formed across Rachel's brow as she let her eyes flutter open as the morning light slowly woke her, the suns rays blaring in through the window making it hard for her to open her eyes. After blinking a few times she felt herself adjust to the light. It was the act of stretching her body across the couch as she raised her arms above her head and let out her morning yawn that she realised the empty space on the couch where here feet had just intruded. "Santana?" She quickly pushed herself to a sitting position, noticing the neatly folded blanket sitting across from her on the coffee table, Rachel couldn't help but frown, knowing that Santana had left. She'd gone.. And that blanket was the only proof that Santana really had been here the night before. The only evidence that Rachel hadn't imagined their conversation showing her that there was more to Santana than she let the world see.


End file.
